The Perfect Sky

As much as I enjoy handling, there's a seductive siren that draws me back to cutting and striking even on teams that depend on my throwing. That seductive siren, that mysterious minx, that tantalizing tease is the perfect sky. For newbies to ultimate, a sky catch is when you jump and catch a disc, hopefully at maximum extension, and hopefully over an airborne defender. It's the equivalent of dunking a basketball over someone you hate, while simultaneously achieving an intense orgasm after making love to Angelina Jolie (sorry Brad –you were great in Seven).

Although I've had a few memorable skies that I'll describe below, I have yet to put together all the necessary elements to form the perfect sky. For me, those elements would be catching the disc at my maximum extension (1), for a critical point (2), over someone who's also at their zenith (3), who I dislike (4). Although crowd reaction is important, it's a given if the other four essential elements are in place.

1. Nurple's first sky – About two months into my first summer with Urban Sprawl, after being yelled at by our ancient captain for not picking up a runner on defense, and with our team being down a few points, I was pissed. On offense, the captain forced a throw to the front corner of the endzone, where two rather large defenders were ready to gobble it up. Converting my anger at the captain into energy, I cut through the defenders, caught the disc after jumping to a decent height, brought it down for a much needed point(2), while my teammates looked on stunned.

2. See your later Burninator – Half way through my first winter of playing, I was starting to really pursue skies while I was on the Burninators, a hat team with some great handlers. In the latter stages in a blowout game, one of my favorite handlers, Geoff Korpinen, was at mid field and looking for me in the end zone. He led me with a beautiful pass that I caught at full extension (1) over a defender who was also at full extension (3). Since the defender was about 6 inches shorter than me, instead of hating him, I felt sorry for the guy. The crowd (all six of them) did go wild though…

3. Call the foul, I dare you – Mid last summer, during a tier 9 game when my team, the Berts and Ernies, was blowing out our opposition, I kept getting fouled by the same guy while making catches. He was the type of jackass who thinks that slapping your wrist is not a foul because you're taller/faster/better looking than he is. It didn't take long before one of the B&E handlers (possibly Andrew Wigston) threw me a high disc in the end zone. Since buddy was stupidly playing behind me, I took a little run and grabbed the disc high (1), took the foul from idiot boy (4) who jumped into me (3ish), and brought it down strong. He immediately said "foul" to which I replied "call a foul, I dare you". After semi-spiking the disc and walking away, I felt pumped.

4. Beavers beware – Although missing elements 2 – 4, my highest catch was against a team called the Raging Blind Beavers in IID last winter. We were getting smoked, and Captain Stu had given up and started to throw long (a rarity). The disc in question wasn't thrown to me, but was too high for the girl (Sophia…I'm not good with last names…the Yale girl) for which it was intended. I took a run up of about a quarter of the field, used a layup approach from basketball, and grabbed the disc at about 10 feet before it went out of the back of the end zone. This catch stands out in my mind because if the disc was even an inch higher, or if I hadn't eaten my Wheaties, the best I could have hoped for would have been a tip to Sophia.

5. Black Nurple vs. Black Pellets – For anyone who's read my OUHA ramblings, you'll know my penchant for rocking black t-shirts during indoor games (they're warmer than white shirts and psychologically devastating to the opposition). During an IID game against the Black Pellets, a disc was thrown to a particularly crowded area of the endzone, where there was one Nurple, and three Pellets. With my black shirt, shorts, wristbands and hat, I had no fear and chased after that bad boy. The sky high catch (1), over three defenders, including two that were jumping (3), blew open a close game (2). The only missing element is that I genuinely enjoyed playing the Black Pellets, since they had a bunch of players who I admire. An amusing sidenote is that immediately after making the catch, one of the female Pellets on the sidelines said something like "Look at how cocky that guy is". Since I've always struggled with my confidence, I couldn't help but laugh as I walked off the field.

6. Black Nurple vs. Black Pellets x 2 – In a playoff game against the same Black Pellets, in which Jacked Pass was once again rocking our black t-shirts, Captain Cory was catching on that if he threw it high, I'd do my best to bring it down. On successive possessions, Cory hucked and I skyed (1) the same defender who was also jumping for the disc (3). Sadly, the game was lopsided in our favor. Plus, although I don't know his name, I respect the hell out of the tall French guy, who lays out for anything within 20 feet of him (and has a cute girlfriend to boot).

Although I have yet to achieve the perfect sky, rest assured that I will continue to chase after the elusive Eros until my calf muscles crumble. I'm always up for hearing about the skying exploits of others, so please feel free to share. Until next time, happy hucking!