Ottawa's "Ultimate" Male Player

"You're simply the best, better than all the rest
Better than anyone, anyone I've ever met."
Tina Turner - Simply the Best

With very few non "weekly recap" entries the last few months, I thought it was time for another fun post. Although this has the potential to be a bit more controversial than the "ultimate accessories" post, it isn't meant to be serious. Therefore, if you're male, from Ottawa, and don't form part of my proposed "ultimate" player, save the threatening emails and digs at my own knowledge/intelligence/skills for someone who cares...like your mom ;-)

Forehand Throws – Gavin Thompson
Backhand Throws – Geofford Seaborn
Special Throws (including pulls) – Mike Hall-Jones
Break Force Throws - Kenny Alexander
Fakes – Tom King
Decision Making – Steve Trainor
Athleticism (aka "Skyability) – Derek Alexander
Behind the back catches - Matt McCalla (honorable mention to Lamo)
Offensive intensity – Glenn Ford
Defensive intensity – Luke Phelan
Defensive Speed – Bryce Ring
Offensive Speed – Jamieson McKay
Height – Mike Hillebrand
Trash Talking – Carl Sharpe
Rules Knowledge – Ken Lange
Off field Attitude – Jack Webb
Leadership – Derek Hodgson
Fashion Sense – Hmmm…very few guys care about fashion…I do enjoy Lamo's gold cleats…Billy Alexander's hat tilt...Pete's field flask…and Gavin's selection of party clothes.

I'll let the surgeons hack away to create this "ultimate" male player. Alternatively, if all these guys had a massive orgy with some of Ottawa's top female players…Phoenix would challenge Furious in 15 – 20 years ;-)

As for the inevitable question, why not try something similar with female players, the answer is that I don't know many of Ottawa's top ladies. Not to say the above list isn't somewhat biased, but I've played with or against everyone listed. Feel free to create your own version of Ottawa's "ultimate" players, or propose additional categories (i.e. has two thumbs and looks best in purple).

Now I must be off to pick-up on a team with the Almighty Kamasutra. Will Nurple be able to overcome the once powerful Mehmet Curse (see May or June entry for reference)??? I'll let you know this weekend. Until next time, happy hucking!