Foolish Playoff Predictions

"Those who wish to appear wise among fools, among the wise seem foolish."
- Quintilian, De Institutione Oratoria

Fellow fools, allow me to present my unwise picks for week 18.

2x12s to crush the Army

Fresh off their second half domination of the Hammers last week, bet on Salmon's 12 to best Army who will come out shooting blanks. Expect forum frequenter Steve to display his flawless rules knowledge (demonstrated against UnMarkable Hardenup last week with a Mule-esque contest call on an obvious non-foul) to outmatch rules no-nothing RPA v 2.0 who is often overheard exclaiming "I mizzunderstood da rulez". For those ulty players with only one shiny nickel to bet, place it on Downtown Dave Brown not hucking the disc further than 10 yards.

Grey to outrun, outjump, and outlast Threezerburn

With four masters players on their roster, Grey will use their youthful legs and boundless energy to physically dominate the slackers and potbellies on Threeze. In a personal message to yours truly last week, Threezie Chow explained that his summer plans consisted of a measily four nights a week of league play, weight lifting, and limited cardio conditioning. He'll never make it on the cover of an ulty e-zine if he keeps up that pathetic excuse for training. Threezies' only chance at victory rests with their 'broken' striker who has been known to pick up older men from the sidelines.

4 Girls One Cup to use short passes in beating Hammers

"Big Simon" will use his famous short-game to lead his faithful followers past the happless, hopeless, happy-hucking Hammers. Count on the never-sarcastic Hilary Juff to remember his socks, and return the Thorlos to a downcast, dumper on the Hammers. The Hammers will be their usual lethargic selfs after following DGo's advice regarding consuming pre-game Big Macs and taking naps. Oh, and Hello Jessie will NOT have a unique celebration for every goal she catches.

Corny Kids to dismantle Ocho

Having fresh legs after a short day's work, Pistol Pete (who's not my handling idol) will run circles around the oldies on Ocho. Speaking of Ocho, how is it that a certain health-nut coordinator let a team be coached by an undedicated, unstrategic, unfit mentor? One would alsmost feel bad for Ocho if they didn't have the distinct privledge of always wearing red shirts (clearly a superiour shirt color to purple).

Quote of the Week:
The slow, clumsy, uncoordinated female wanna-be striker on Hammers.
"I'm sorry from dropping that easy pass guys. Have I mentioned that I hate playing for this team!"

Since I have tonnes of energy after an easy quarter end at work, I thought about rambling on the ultra-important urine steam flip. However, since I care so much about my critics and their opinions of the quality of my writing, I've decided to sign off. Until next time, depressed dumping!